our little lucy.

On Friday morning, {cv} and I woke up like normal to Lucy jumping on the bed. She heard his alarm and knew it was her time to cuddle before he jumped in the shower for work. Lucy made one pass over the top of both of us and was going back for more. She walked on {cv}'s chest then onto mine. Lucy then turned and walked toward my legs. She took a little nosedive, which we thought was normal...she loved for us to rub her belly. Only this time, it wasn't normal. She made a few quick noises and then I went to razz her...and realized something wasn't right. I looked at {cv} and said: "I think she's gone." 

We couldn't process it right then, because in the flurry of the next ten minutes...we put Gus in a crate and put Lucy in another and were out the door to the vet. Sadly, We knew she was gone before we left the apartment. Some part of us just hoped Lucy was playing some cruel game. Except she wasn't. The vet confirmed what we already knew. She also checked out Gus, just to make sure he was ok. The vet assured us we'd done nothing wrong. Lucy had been absolutely normal the day before...she was eating, drinking, and using the bathroom. She was affectionate at the usual times. Nothing out of the ordinary. In the ten years our vet has been practicing, she's only seen about ten cases of sudden death--our Lucy being one of them. We've decided to have an necropsy {i.e. an animal autopsy}, just to rule out any issues around the apartment which might affect our Gus. In reality, we're pretty certain though that it was her big heart that took her.

It's the little things that we don't want to forget, which is why I'm writing this post. Lucy always greeted me at the door when I would get home from work, so I know today will be difficult. She always rolled over for me to rub her belly and did a biggggggg stretch. Showering has been hard because Lucy always loved to jump in the wet tub. Doing my hair has been rough because Lucy buried her nose in my wet towel on a daily basis.

Lucy had quite the attachment to {cv} though--and it's been hard to think about her absence. Lucy loved smelling his shoes when he got home after a long day. She'd leave him little presents in the form of bobby pins in his loafers, which he'd find on business trips. {Have you figured out she was a quirky cat yet?} They were cuddle buddies--and she made me jealous on more than one occasion ;)

We had a nice dinner out on Saturday and I kept the cork from our wine. Normally, Lucy would find it in my purse around 3:00am, when we were trying to sleep...and play to her little heart's content. This morning, it's still in my purse. 

Gus hasn't been the same without his partner in crime. Gus and Lucy came home from the shelter the same week. Though they weren't siblings, they were almost inseparable. {cv} and I got used to having them around--together. We're trying to read him to figure out whether he needs another buddy. He's been looking in every corner this weekend--and any noise perks his ears as if she was suddenly going to bound around the corner.

So, this morning...as we wait for the results on what took Lucy from us all too soon, I'll never forget her peaceful little face looking out our windows. Few people have to experience watching something like we did on Friday morning...and I don't think the memory of that minute will soon fade. Lucy was like our child. Anyone who says pets aren't like family is certainly wrong. I'm trying to smile knowing Lucy is now enjoying a wonderful life outside the window up in kitty heaven. 

So, today, give your pets an extra squeeze and please say a little prayer for strength
for {cv}, Gus, and me...xoxo {av}

P.S. Thank you to those of you who saw my tweets and sent along your love...it meant the world to us.

80 comments:

  1. omy av, so sad! im realllly sorry for your loss. and these photos are so adorable, lucy reminds me of a cat we had when i was little..spooky. its hard to lose a pet, just remember those good times and keep on keepin on. love you lots! xoxo jcd

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  2. I'm so so sorry for your loss. Losing a pet is exactly like losing a family member..because they are family. Thinking of you.

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  3. oh gosh i am so sorry. losing a pet is so difficult. at the end of my family chocolate lab's life, she had to wear a cone while we weren't home and you could hear the cone scraping against the front door when you were unlocking it because she was so excited. it has been 10 years since she has passed and when i go to my moms house and put my hand on the door knob i sometimes still hear her cone scraping.

    again, i am so sorry and i will give my pup extra love tonight and keep you in my thoughts.

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  4. Aw, I'm so sorry to hear about your cat! I hope all is well!

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  5. I'm so sorry to hear about your loss. Loosing an animal is like loosing a member of your family. It sounds like she was such a special cat, you were lucky to have her in your life.

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  6. I literally have tears streaming down my face reading this because as an animal lover, I know what a loss this is. I'm so sorry and am sending warm hugs your way. xoxo

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  7. this was a beautiful post for a beautiful kitty. my thoughts are with all of you. try to keep your chin up, Lucy would hate to see you sad i'm sure. xoxo

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  8. I'm so sorry for your loss! Pets are family members and I understand how difficult it is to go through this. This sweet post made me cry, but I know that Lucy was so loved all of her life!

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  9. this is so sad. losing a pet is terrible.
    sending you lots of love,
    marissa

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  10. {av}, I am so, so sorry for your loss. To lose a pet, especially in the way that you did is so tragic and almost unimaginable. Lucy sounded like a great cat and I was smiling through my tears when I read this post because many of her little tricks and habits are ones my cat has too :)

    I lost my horse of nine years a few years ago and while the pain never truly goes away, it does get easier...hang in there!

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  11. thinking about you and your family today. extra prayers are being sent out. xo kendall

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  12. My heart goes out to you and your family. I'm so sorry! I'll be giving Ace, my beagle, and extra squeeze today for you.

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  13. I can't even fathom what you feel. My heart hurts for your tragic loss. A pet is a child, a member of your family. I hope that Gus learns to get on without his partner in crime...lots of kitty pets and squeezes for him over the next few weeks....xo..

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  14. so sorry to hear this...Thinking about you!

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  15. I am so sorry for your loss, I can't even imagine. Sending lots of prayers your way!

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  16. I am so sorry to hear about your sweet kitty. I agree that furbabies are a member of your family. I will say a prayer for you today.

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  17. I am so sorry! Losing a pet it so hard...they are like part of the family.

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  18. I am sooo sorry for your loss! Your story completely broke my heart :( Pets are so much more than that, they are a mamber of our families, so I can't imagine what you are going through. I will give my Barkley even more hugs today - your story reminds me how precious our time together is!

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  19. aw love this breaks my heart. my pup is like my child and i would just lose it if that happened. I lost my first dog when she was only 5, and i was absolutely heartbroken. pets become family. Sending so many hugs and love your way right now. xx

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  20. My heart goes out to you and your husband. I also lost a pet suddenly, without warning and I am not sure if that scar ever heals. Be kind to yourself and each other during these next few days as they will be hard. If I could hug you both I would. This post broke my heart. Best to you both and snuggles to your other little one.

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  21. I know that I would be utterly heartbroken if either of my babies were gone...so sorry for your loss!

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  22. Oh my gosh, I don't know how I missed this on twitter! I am so sorry... I know how hard this is. I will be thinking about y'all! xoxo

    ps: This was such a sweet post to honor Lucy!

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  23. aw av I am so beyond sorry for your loss. I love cats and believe that pets are family, and I lost my cat in college who I grew up with, so while I don't exactly what you're going through, I will keep you, Gus, and cv in my thoughts and prayers.

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  24. I'm so very sorry! She was a beautiful cat.

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  25. sending my love to you guys & gus

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  26. sending LOTS & LOTS of love your way!!! so sorry for your loss.

    xo! Lauren @ tickled.

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  27. This post broke my heart. I am so so sorry to hear about poor Lucy. It sounds like she had a wonderful life and was so loved. You will be in my thoughts and prayers during this sad time.

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  28. I'm so sorry about your loss, I am sending much love and happy thoughts your way. She sounds like an awesome cat...

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  29. I can't even imagine! The only people who say animals aren't family are people who don't have pets! I'm so sorry for your loss....I'm glad your remembering all the happy times:)

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  30. Sorry to hear about your kitty! I loved hearing the stories. It sounds like she was an awesome cat!

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  31. I'm so sorry to hear this, Huge hugs to you guys and Gus. Keep hold of all those photos and memories. xo

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  32. I am so sorry about your loss. Losing a pet is like losing part of your family! Thoughts are with you!

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  33. So sorry to hear this, I have never had or lost a pet but I know that it is not easy to go through. Sending you big hugs!

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  34. Oh my! So sudden. I am so sorry, I can't even imagine. Take care.

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  35. Awe, I'm so sorry to hear about Lucy. Losing a pet is really such an awful thing to go through, but I think you have the right attitude. Remember the good times you had with her and give Gus some extra loving.
    Keep your head up and I hope the rest of the week brightens up a bit for you.

    ~ Julie

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  36. I am so sorry for the loss of Lucy. My heart is aching for you, CV, and Gus. I hope you can find the answers you're looking for. If you need anyone to talk with, I am always here.

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  37. Thinking of you and {cv}. Sending prayers of strength and understanding.

    XoXo

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  38. I have tears running down my face. I'm so sorry for your loss, especially such a sudden and unexpected loss. My heart goes out to you, cv, and Gus. Cherish her quirky qualities and the beautiful photos of her.

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  39. I'm so, so sorry to hear of Lucy's death - what an awful, sudden way to lose a pet. <3

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  40. I'm so sorry for your loss :( I know if I lost my little puppy it would be devastating so I can sympathize a million times over. My thoughts are with you guys!

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  41. I'm sorry lady. I know how you feel. Hope it gets better in time!

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  42. Girl, I really am so sorry for your loss! Sending a prayer your way! xo

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  43. Your post made me cry at work. So heartbreaking. I can't even imagine. Poor Gus.

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  44. Oh, I am so sorry! Losing a pet is so heart-breaking...but how wonderful for Lucy to have lived such a happy, loved life!

    This sounds crazy, but my mom once told me that when you lose a pet, the hardest part is walking in the door when they aren't there to greet you anymore. She said that if you acknowledge their presence anyway- for example, saying, "hi, Lucy!" when you walk in the door, it can really help with the pain. I thought this was so cooky until I tried it, and realized that it really does help; it almost keeps them with you. After all, your Lucy will always be a part of your heart!

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  45. I'm so, so sorry, Alison! All of my thoughts and prayers are with you, CV, and Gus!

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  46. Oh no! Poor Lucy and poor you guys! How awful. I'm so teary-eyed after reading this...so devastating and scary. You have my thoughts and prayers, and I will definitely be giving my Gus many hugs and kisses today.

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  47. This post brought tears to my eyes. I am so, so sorry for your loss. Pets are family, and I can't even think about the day when we lose our Sadie. I'm just so sorry for you guys. If it's any consolation, at least it sounds like she died quickly and in a happy peaceful moment, free of pain. I really will be thinking of you today!

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  48. Awww I'm so sorry for your loss! Pets are members of your family! I will be thinking of you. XOXO

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  49. So sorry to hear about the loss of your sweet kitty! What kind of cat was Lucy? She was absolutely beautiful!

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  50. what beautiful kitties! i can't imagine it when you don't expect it. :( i'm so sorry.

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  51. I'm so sorry to hear this. It's one thing to be prepared for it and another thing for it to totally come out of the blue. Either way I understand what you are going through.

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  52. Thinking of you my dear friend. I know how hard it is & I am so sorry for this great loss. It's amazing how attached we become with our fluffeh friends. I hope Gus will be okay and I am praying for you all to heal during this time. Lots of love to you! xoxo

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  53. Oh my goodness. I am so incredibly sorry to hear about your sweet Lucy Girl. After reading this, I was in tears. As a fellow cat owner (& owner of a Lucy girl), I know this has to be incredibly hard for you and cv. Being our age, our animals almost become like our children. My heart goes out to you & cv. I'll be sure to say a prayer for you guys, sweet Lucy, and Gus. Xoxoxo

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  54. So sad for you...sent up a little prayer for you and for Lucy.

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  55. i'm so sorry about lucy. i lost my kitty about a year ago and i know how hard it is. much love.

    xo.ashley

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  56. So I'm sitting here in Panera, crying. Such a crazy bloggy cat-lover I am. What breaks my heart is that Moses is that she reminds me of my sweet Moses (& boy oh boy does Gus look like him!). I cannot wait to go home tonight and snuggly my sweet fluffy furball.
    Praying for you three! I know it may sound soon, but I think you should get another buddy for poor Gus. Him looking for her is what made my heart break even more (along with me thinking what it would be like for Moses not to great me at the door with squinty eyes.)
    xoxoxoxox,
    Leigh

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  57. I am so sorry! It is very hard, I lost my little Scottie dog in november. You get so attached to them! Just be grateful for the fun times you had with her! I'll be thinking about your and praying for y'all!

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  58. I am so sorry about Lucy. You keep looking for them in their normal spaces, and have a sad moment each time. I'm thinking about you :(

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  59. This breaks my heart! I do believe that she is up in kitty heaven running and playing with the other animals. I will be thinking about you! My kitten is also named lucy. I will give her an extra big hug just for you. :)

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  60. I am so so sorry for your loss... I have an almost 19 year old kitty that's my best friend and I'm dreading the day she leaves me. I can understand how you feel....

    :(

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  61. so sorry to hear this! i love the pictures, she looks so sweet. my thoughts are with you all :(

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  62. I'm so sorry about Lucy av! - Pets really are family and when one passes away it's always terribly difficult to come to terms with. I will definitely have you, cv and Gus in my thoughts

    Hang in there,
    Jenna

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  63. oh, allison, i am so sorry to hear that. reading this just made me tear up. i can't imagine going through something like that and am sending you and your boys my love today.

    xo
    i wander, i wonder

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  64. Losing a pet is so hard. So sorry.

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  65. Sending all three of you lots of love. It's a blessing that she passed quickly, but I'm sure you guys are still in shock. I'm so sorry, darling.

    xo

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  66. i'm so sorry! this brought tears to my eyes!! losing a pet is a horrible feeling and i'm saying a prayer for you guys! xo

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  67. Omg, this was the saddest post I've ever read. I'm so so so so sorry! My heart goes out to y'all. Stay strong!

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  68. I am so sorry to hear this!! It has got to be worse because it's so sudden! I sometimes cry just thinking about when my dog passes, I'm sure you're devastated. :(

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  69. I am so sorry. Pets are like children, so I'm sure that was and is so hard. Thinking about you!

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  70. I'm so so so sorry to her this... breaks my heart. our dog is like a child to us so I can certainly relate... I'm so sorry!

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  71. I'm so, so sorry for your loss; your lovely memories of your sweet Lucy made me tear up. I'm thinking of you and cv and sending you positive thoughts as you get through this challenging time. xo

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  72. Oh goodness that just made me cry. I'm so sorry for your loss. Kudos for having the strength to write about it and preserve her memory. I'm keeping you in my thoughts this evening...

    Haley @ Cardigan Junkie
    www.cardiganjunkie.com

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  73. AW I'm so sorry!!! I lost my dog a few years back and it was so hard. Saying a prayer for you and Lucy today!

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  74. I cannot even imagine this. I am so sorry to hear about your loss. My two cats are two of the most important things in my life. I can't imagine losing one at all, let alone like that. I hope you feel better.

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  75. I'm so sorry :-( I can't even imagine losing my kitty. Yours sounded so sweet. I'm terribly sorry
    http://heatherfrostx.blogspot.com/

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  76. Oh man, I'm so sorry. Cat's are the best and I can't imagine that happening. I hope you guys are doing a little better today :(

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  77. Oh my goodness...I am so sorry to hear about Lucy. Sounds almost unbelievable...I'm sure you're all in shock. :( What you said is absolutely true...our pets are every much a part of our family and that is just just heartbreaking to hear of your loss. My thoughts are with you.

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  78. I am so sorry to hear about your cat. Losing a pet is so hard, my heart goes out to you. xoxo

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  79. As I told you on Twitter, I am so sorry this happened. Pets are definitely like a part of the family. :(

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